Knowgonzalo

Today was a day that I witnessed something I thought I would never see until I have my own kids: I saw a kid piss in front of a store in public. It was the craziest thing I've seen since that naked swimmer in London. There I am handing out candy and then I look behind, and there at the exit is this kid, doing his piss dance. You know the dance: the dance you do when you can't hold it in any longer. Then all of a sudden he pulls down his pants and a golden stream flows out. I screamed! And then I ducked for cover. The Mom came out and told me that my scream scared her son and that he may never piss in public again. I hope so.

I was part of the live audience for a new pilot, the show is untitled but it is produced by Courtney Cox and David Arquette (they even had their new born baby with them. What's it's name? Coco or Mango, i think?). I was pretty excited. The only other time I had a chance to see a show being recorded was when my awesome California friends, the dynamic duo of Sarah & Aaron, got me into a taping of the show "8 Simple Rules." That was pretty sweet, becuase we had to sneak in there and we pretended to be some suits (without the suits). Plus, seeing how small David Spade is in person is something else. But this taping had it's moments. The premise of the show revolves around 3 girl hosts of this morning talk show, a la "the View." It stars Nancy Travis and some other people that I can recognize, but I don't care to remember their names. The show had it's moments, but overall I wouldn't watch it. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't give it a chance when it comes out. Plus, that way you can listen for my particular laugh that seems to come out at the wrong moments.
What sucked about the taping was that I arrived at the studios at 4:15pm and I did not leave until 12:15pm!! 8 freakin' hours. It was like I was at a job, only I did not get paid. I did not even get food or water. All we got was some chocolate and I was lucky enough to get a shirt (which I gave away to this girl who wanted it more than I did). It was quite an experience though, and if it had not been for the 8 hours, I would do it again. The "fluffer" (that's the guy who is in charge of warming up the audience) said that the longest pilot he ever "fluffed" was "King of Queens," and that went for 10 hours! But usually, these tapings only take up to 5 hours. Those endless hours result in 22 minutes of a tv show! Crazy.

Tonight was an awesome night!! But it didn't start out that way. Don't all great stories begin like that? So we go to this Latin Club in Universal City (that's where Universal Studios is) called Roomba Room. My partner said they were giving free Salsa lessons and that there was no cover. Sweet: No Cover!! Most places in Los Angeles charge a $30 to $40 cover!! The place had an older crowd, was not very packed and the lessons where alright, but the fun began when the dance lessons ended. 10min after class, Ozzy Osbourne* walks in!! Crazy. I couldn't believe it. I was right not to believe it, *he was not really Ozzy Osbourne but an imitador. But man, the resemblence was uncanny! He even walked in with a lady that looked like his wife, Sharon. The funny thing about him was that he went by the name of "Trainwreck" (that name is associated with someone else from my college days...oh man, that's a whole 'nother story). So "Ozzy" had with him two ladies, they were a Mother and Daughter from Australia. They just arrived into Los Angeles earlier in the night and met Trainwreck outside of the Mann Chinese Theatre where he was posing for pictures and somehow "Ozzy" just latched on and did not let go. I don't blame him, you see, the daughter was EXTREMELY hot. She was beautiful. "Ozzy" tried to convince her Mom that she could be an imitador for Paris Hilton and that there is good money in the imitador/look-alike business (there's a business for that?). But sorry buddy, this Australian girl,(her name is Lori by the way), is way more attractive than Paris Hilton.